Themes in Household D/s

Posted by Tanos on Sun 26 Feb 06, 11:08 AM

This is my second draft essay about my personal style of D/s, which I'm calling "Household D/s." Last month I dealt with Roles in HDS, and here I provide a brief overview of some other themes that I keep in mind.

"Household D/s" (HDS) is a style of D/s centered on the idea of the household, in the Victorian or Edwardian sense. It is influenced by Victorian and Edwardian structures and manners, but also includes more positive attitudes to servants and slaves from Roman and Eastern models. This essay introduces some of the main themes of HDS.

Hierarchy

D/s is built on hierarchy, and on relationships which are necessarily asymmetric and unequal. Since HDS households may involve multiple members, along with guests and supplicants, a clear hierarchy contributes to the stability of the house. Unlike some historical commercial models of slavery and service, HDS sees slaves and submissives as valuable members of the household.

Roles

HDS recognises many roles within the hierarchy of the household, and acknowledges that submissives may occupy different roles at different times. Roles may have rituals, rules and levels of formality associated with them, and identifying roles clarifies which behaviours are appropriate for the current time and place.

Dignity

Dignity, and the need to avoid undignified behaviour, are guiding principles for masters, and promote the stability and proper functioning of the household and its interactions with people outside.

Maintaining dignity requires the avoidance of lying, cheating, lack of effort or breaking one's word. It means rejecting fantasy, and instead seeking authenticity: being the same on the outside as you are on the inside. It also means not compromising on one's own freedom, including making oneself dependent on others because of lack of self-discipline, and not compromising one's self in the face of resistance from submissives and social pressures from outside the household.

In short, it is beneath a master's dignity to engage in unworthy behaviour.

Respect

Respect for other's legitimate spheres of authority promotes proper interaction between hosts and guests, and members of the household and those outside. People who are not in service are naturally within their own sphere of authority, and submissives serving other households are under that house's head. Respect informs both the broad limits of behaviour and the fine details, such as attempting to command other submissives without the appropriate consent, and calling people by the names they use themselves.

Stability

Stability gives members of the household a solid foundation on which to build their lives. By rejecting manipulation, deceit, meaningless changes, unpredictable moods, financial crises or other irresponsbility, a stable environment can be provided. As well as benefitting the practical running of the house, it promotes emotional development and depth of submission: it creates a place that can be trusted, and in which it is safe to submit to the authority of the master.

Ritual

Ritual, that is behaviours which are repeated and which carry a meaning, provide structure and reinforcement of the hierarchy of the household, and the submissive's valued place within it.

Authenticity

Household D/s seeks to set aside some of the worst fantasy elements of D/s and M/s prevalent in the BDSM Scene, especially in the online world. This means presenting the household to its members and outsiders as it really is, and basing rituals and practices on a natural evolution of real history and society, rather than from fantasy novels and chatroom roleplaying.

Edited Mon 1 Sep 08, 4:21 PM by Tanos